Fuck the buskers taking over our streets

I wish buskers would shut the fuck up.

I know I’m annoying to listen to, but if you don’t want to listen to me at a gig you can leave. I’m not gonna force you to listen to me. Buskers aren’t as kind as I am. Remember that.

A recent study by me so showed that 73% of noise pollution on these streets is caused by buskers. A further 12% is caused by crying babies. The other 15% is miscellaneous. These days hustlers finna resort to tricks when moving in silence and violence.

What’s more, buskers expect us to pay for their noise pollution. You wouldn’t see someone dumping their trash on the road and then give them a dollar.

Maybe it’s harsh to put a busker and someone dumping their trash on the road in the same category, but have you ever walked away from a busker and thought, “Man I’m glad that person is alive. We really need them on this earth.” I feel the same way about people who dump their trash on the sidewalk.

We need to urgently extend the power of the EPA to allow them to administer noise pollution as well, and we need to give them guns. Maybe then these selfish thugs will think twice before they dump trash or play the harp on public transport.

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